Are you the Mac Daddy, the CEO, the Man in Charge?
Your lifestyle choices reflect your hard-earned status as Top Dog, so why clutter up your phone with proletariat ghetto apps? That’s why SteveWare Labs has released the first-ever “prestige app”, Munchie Madness Bling Edition.
Encrusted with over 2,345 carrots of flawless virtual diamonds meticulously set in a hand-crafted solid gold interface, the blinding brilliance of Munchie Madness Bling Edition tells the world that you are G’d up from the feet up, 24/7. If real, the diamonds, gold and craftsmanship that went into creating this app alone would be worth well over $5 million. Now that’s a statement to the world.
ABOUT MUNCHIE MADNESS BLING EDITION
Munchie Madness Bling Edition is more than just diamonds and gold. MMBE represents the bleeding edge of munchie procurement technology. Utilizing our breakthrough Hankering Algorithm, Munchie Madness instantly sifts through the entire accumulated knowledge of all mankind since the dawn of time to display the exact location of the best Cheeseburger, Pizza , Sandwich or Caviar within the specified range of your current geographic location.
Granted, you could type a search term into 3 or 4 of your favorite search engines, comb through the results, read the reviews, find the addresses, flip a coin, and hope your burger doesn’t suck. Or, you could place the awesome power of Munchie Madness Bling Edition on your iPhone and breathe easy, secure in the knowledge that the ultimate in culinary satisfaction is only one click away. Furthermore, Munchie Madness doesn’t give you a frustrating list of 10 million choices. Let’s face it – no one likes to read. What people really want is for a small black box to tell them where to eat, and that’s what Munchie Madness delivers. When you click “Cheeseburger” you will only get one restaurant. The best one. The one you should go to. How do we know? Cause we’re freakin scientists, man.
FEATURES
• Sumptuous hand-crafted solid gold interface encrusted with 2,345 carrots of flawless virtual diamonds
• One-click area search for awesome Cheeseburgers, Pizza , Sandwiches or Caviar, the quality of which is guaranteed to satisfy the discerning tastes of our distinguished clientele.
• Built on our patented* Hankering Algorithm
• Map, routing and directions provided
• Configurable geo search radius
• Restaurant filtering. If you don’t like a particular chain or restaurant, you can remove it from the app.
• Chicks dig it.
• Guys will think you’re cool.
*Not patented in the sense that we actually went to the patent office and got a real patent. More like “patented” as in “that sounds cool and important.” There are no patents. Please don’t sue us.
FAQ
Should I fear such awesome technology?
No. Drink deep from the well of knowledge. Fear not the awesomeness, but revel in its…well…awesomeness.
Am I cool enough to posses one of the greatest technological and artistic marvels of the 21st century?
Of course you are. You deserve the best. Now click that Install button. Go on, click it.
It seems a little expensive?
If you’re worried about money, this is NOT the app for you. There are plenty of free cardboard apps laying around. Please check back with us after you get a job.
ABOUT STEVEWARE LABS
When we’re not theorizing on particle physics with the boyz over at the Large Hadron Collider (we never are), or talkin’ Mars smack with the crew at NASA (don’t know anyone there), or bustin’ code with the Supreme Geeks in Silicon Valley (never happens), we are knee deep in our never ending quest to find the BEST freakin munchies on the planet. At SteveWare Labs the sheer weight and volume of our centralized brainpower threatens to tear the very fabric of space, so who could possibly be more qualified to find a good pizza?